I am now having to face my ultimate fear: being the subject of men's attention! Ah!

Date:   5/7/2006 8:48:31 AM ( 18 y ago)

Day 30!!! Lalalaaaa! Day 30!!! Lalalaaa!

Okay. That's out of my system.

So I have had to face something that I have been hiding behind the fat: Guys are looking at me, and it scares me! So I am afraid of being vulnerable. I was a wallflower in high-school and I hid behind the fat.

Yesterday, I wore a black dress that's very low cut. I went to the department store to get a food processor (so I can eat raw meals when I begin eating again). Every man would walk circles around me and kept looking at me...even the ones pushing their kids around in buggies looking for Mother's Day gifts!!! Ew!

But I have NEVER been checked out before! I used to always hide behind baggy clothes, because 1. I was fat, and 2. I have a large chest.

However, now I am becoming shapely and svelt. I am entering into a territory I have never been before. Now I have to learn to cope. I am used to being super-guarded, never letting anyone "in".

*sigh* It's not a bad problem to have, just unknown to me.

On a slightly different note, my Bible study teacher was telling me how great I look. She noted how clear and glowing my skin looks.

I feel very pretty!

 

Popularity:   message viewed 2792 times
URL:   http://www.curezone.org/blogs/fm.asp?i=981047

<< Return to the standard message view