Day 1

Date:   10/29/2005 9:50:30 PM ( 19 y ago)

I've been doing so well today! Yay! Well, the day is not over yet.

I woke up to cramps in my upper abdomen this morning. I couldn't even stand up straight. I think it was from all the greasy food and oil I ate from the previous day. Ugh. I'm actually quite happy I felt that way this morning because I was in no mood to eat at all. After my salt water flush, I felt much better.

Learning from my other first attempts to fasting, I kept busy mentally but not physically. The other times, I would go running, go to class, go out with friends, and that all resulted in bad side effects: low energy, hunger, headaches, ditziness (not dizziness) :-), low memory, and then the inability to resist temptation. I've been laying low today, rented five movies, sitting in front of the computer, not talking to anybody, listening to music, and staying away from the kitchen. I really think not speaking to anybody helps immensely. My mom continuously asks if I want to eat...Linh, dinner! Linh, eat! "NO, I do not want to!" I warned my family yesterday that I really need to be left alone for the next few days...otherwise, the bitch will come out. They understand, hopefully. It is rough staying at home for a long period of time after living single.

As a result of my good day, I haven't experienced any headaches or low energy. Yay! My mind is more clear...WEIRD. And I am happy. Most of all, happy with myself. The day is not over yet, though. Taking this one minute, one hour, one day at a time.

Yes, I am experiencing some hunger pangs, the sense of missing the aroma, the taste, the actual warmth of food. The sensation, though, is not that strong. My inner strength and lightness of my body is overpowering all the negative feelings of food. Wow, my body feels so much lighter. I do not want to wake up to a rock gut like this morning. I want to wake up feeling light and refreshed.

Reading one message in a forum, this lady was complaining about always "starting tomorrow." Yes. That was my excuse day after day, month after month, year after year. What I never realized before today was that, " starting tomorrow" is not me. With everything else in life, I accomplish things today, never tomorrow. Well then, why couldn't I apply that to my health? I hate dirt. I hate uncleanliness. I hate germs. I am a germ freak. That is why I am going to overcome the "I WILL START TOMORROW" DISEASE! It is a disease. I don't want a disease in my body and brain. Hell, no. Today. Right now. That is what's its going to be like from now on with EVERYTHING, especially when it comes to me. Now, I wish I could wave my wand and say, "Fat, Begone!" and all the fat would disappear at this instant. :-)

Plan of action: Goal #1 is to get through today successfully. Goal #2 is to get through Day 2 successfully. Goal #3 is to get through Day 3 successfully. Do you see a pattern? I cannot say how long I will be fasting. I really can't. As for what kind of fast I will be doing....
On days that do not require much energy, I will be fasting on just water. Otherwise, I will be drinking the Master Cleanser's lemonade. I can't be that extreme yet. My mini-goal is to make it to next Friday and to lose about 10 pounds. We'll see. I don't want to disappoint myself if I do not reach Friday or if I don't lose 10 pounds. One day at a time, remember?

I am going to try to exercise 45 minutes a day at a low intensity. And will not be doing the SWF on my water fast days. I hear its bad when you do that. When I'm drinking the lemonade, I will definately be eliminating all that crap inside of me.

One more thing, displaying the picture of myself at 105 pounds is helping me immensely. Yes, it was from the 9th grade, but whatever works, heh?

Gotta go watch another movie now.

Stats from this morning before my SWF:
145.2 pounds, 31.2 % body fat.



 

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