The Recounting of a Recent Experience that Gave Me a Different Perspective on Death

Date:   7/26/2005 2:32:07 AM ( 19 y ago)

Several weeks ago I had a very interesting experience that gave me a whole new perspective on death. It’s amazing to me that this wonderful experience happened while I was driving in my car. It just goes to show that you never know when the universe is going to knock on your door or your windshield for that matter. So now onto the story. I was leaving my sister’s house at 12 or 1 in the morning after a day of spending time with her and my niece. As it was late, I knew there would not be a lot of cars on the road. I was glad for this as it would make for a nice, easy and uneventful ride home. Well, that’s what I thought anyway.

As I was driving, I started to think about my grandmother. Over the proceeding months, she had begun to get weaker and weaker. She was down to about 70 pounds and had difficulty walking and doing other things she normally had no trouble with. We could tell that the vitality that she had for so long (she worked until she was 86) was beginning to wane. In light of these noticeable changes, there were several family members including myself who had the feeling that her time was getting short. Even her cardiologist had told us that her heart after a heart attack several years ago and a leaky valve that she had all her life was just not strong enough any more.

Needless to say, all of these things started to run around in my head and I started to become sad at the thought of losing her. Just as these emotions were coming over me, I felt some kind of presence in the car. Then I had this rush of energy and emotion run all throughout my body. It was a feeling of complete happiness. It was amazing to me. There were tears rolling down my cheeks and these tears were not ones of sorrow but ones of utter joy. Although this rush of emotions was a welcome change, I wondered how they came about. I knew it could not have come from me. So where did these feelings originate from? It must have come from this presence I felt. Unfortunately, as soon as these wonderful emotions passed through me the presence was gone.

Thinking about who or what this could be, my intuition was telling me it must have been a relative who had already passed over. Immediately, my mind went to my grandfather. He had died very early in life of a sudden heart attack. After his death, my grandmother was devastated. She never remarried or even dated another man for that matter. She had once told me that she cried so much after he died that she was never able to cry again. Now that is definitely love and dedication. With the discovery of who I thought it was, I then went on to think about why he was so happy.

My initial reaction to the possible death of my grandmother brought up thoughts of separation and feelings of sadness and sorrow. However, death for him brought up thoughts of unity and feelings of joy and happiness. This was just so fascinating to me. The fact that the two of us were thinking about the same thing but had two entirely different reactions. Yet, this somehow made sense. For me it was the separation. Upon death, I would lose the physical representation of my grandmother. She would no longer be here physically. It is the physical connection and the giving and receiving of love through that physical connection that creates this sense of loss and makes it hard for any of us to part with our loved ones. However, from my grandfather’s point of view it was life not death that was creating the separation between them. The longer she lived, the longer they were separated from one another. I never realized how difficult that must be for those on the other side. It was really the same kind of separation that was beginning to make me sad.

So for him, the idea of death was the complete opposite of the way I saw it. His thoughts were ones of unity. Death would allow him the opportunity to reunite with the woman whom he so dearly loved as well. This is where the feelings of joy and happiness come into play. He was sharing with me his feelings concerning their reunion. He would no longer have to wait to be with her. His term of separation was near an end. Thinking about it from that perspective, how could he not be happy? After 50 or so years of waiting, it was finally his time to be with my grandmother.

This was an amazing experience for me as I had only thought of death from the perspective of those that are left behind. Death robs us of the physical representations of our friends and relatives and we have no way of changing that. While we may celebrate who they were and rejoice that they are now in heaven and are no longer burdened by age; pain; sickness or disease, we still cannot help but feel that separation. Yet, there is a whole other perspective on this. One which comes from the other side where the spirit roams free. Just as in our world, their own deaths separate them from the spiritual and physical manifestations of their loved ones. Yet, when it’s time and those loved ones make the journey to the other side there is a great reunion. I can almost imagine a great big party welcoming the new spirit to heaven. It must be similar to waiting for a baby to be born. When a baby is ready to be born everyone is so excited and filled with anticipation. I guess it is no different for those on the other side waiting for a soul to make its journey on home. They must be equally excited and filled with anticipation.

I then began to realize that I will also one day have the opportunity to rejoin all of my loved ones who have passed on. When it is my time to return home, I will be welcomed by all of these wonderful souls who are excited and filled with anticipation at my arrival. I am sure it will be one great big welcome home bash. Remembering this fact, helps to erase all of those negative images that our culture has either created or helped to perpetuate regarding death and dying. It is unfortunate that the fear of death is still so prevalent in our society. Isn’t it about time that we all begin to think differently about death and release ourselves from all of those fears? I do.

Well now that I have undergone this wonderful experience for which I am very thankful, I now have a different perspective on death that in my view makes it a little bit easier to deal with the separation. While I can’t say that I won’t have any feelings of sadness or sorrow at the death of my grandmother, I can say that there will definitely be a part of me that is happy and joyous. I will be happy to know that these two people who loved one another so much but were tragically separated too early in life will finally be together again.


 

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