in process...results and follow up's from the Whole Being Weekend

Date:   9/26/2006 4:19:45 PM ( 18 y ago)

September 27th
8:10 AM

email of interest.
FIC
site

http://directory.ic.org/records/?action=view&page=view&record_id=2069

Wrote Blog this morning
on World Peace Breaks Out...
HOld back a bit...do not want to do send something
that feels inflammatory or hurts. Sent to Peggy and Scott first
for Feedback. What do you think?

http://curezone.com/blogs/m.asp?f=92&i=1892



September 26, 06
2:28 PM

Difficult fear emotion coming up
again while napping. Talking to inner child.
Why such stress now? Being triggered again.

JM called.

Room a mess.

Work with some numbers.
I dreaded looking at the leak
that showed up while I left for the WBW.
Does not look like a big deal.
Called Rainbow.

The Message?

Fear! Get out of that place!
Not necessary, little one.

Sit near me, little one.
Let me work, o.K.?
I will tend to you later, o.k.?
I promise not to abandon you.
Here are my spirit guides to play with.
You are not alone, little one.

Let Daddy work, O.k., Little one?
I love you, little one.
Sorry...are you scared?
are you afraid?
I am hear for you.
can you here me.


Other Contacts from WBW, potential new allies:

Kat Alessi, Intuitive healer
Kat@energykatalyst.com

Quote:

Paul Edwards,
Peace Pies...
Wow!!! Bright...we see each other at the FM.
This was a breakthrough!!!! Yum!
New powerful ally!!1 Hey!!

Mentions Paul here:
http://www.sdcitybeat.com/article.php?id=4328&atype=

The Peace Pie guy sells fresh fruit pies meant to be eaten raw that include, among others, apple-pear or apple-berry that looked yummy, but I didn’t taste.

He made a pie for the Rosh Hashanah.
We all ate the Missing Peace.
Invite him to the house...

Bring the WBW down from the Mountain...

___

Jeff Happy Bear, 760.815.6115
Massage Therapist, Spiritual Facilitator

Deep Tissue, Trigger Point, Emotional Release, Energy
Balancing, Sweat Lodge, Weddings, Sacred Pipe,
Healing & Dream Altars.

My old friend since the 80's took time to Plant a Dream
on the Tree Altar.

Where is my energy?
Where is the leak?
Where is the Crack?
What is down in the Crack?

___
Randa Thompson
"Helping students to find yoga classes
and events worldwide"
Http://www.yogafinder.com

She will sponsor the photos on my website.

___

Quicker way to upload!?????



2:41 PM
September 25, 06

Feeling the urge to return Best Friends
sweet call from last night. Wonder what
she is up to this week? She had time
off from Mom duties.

Been naping on and off,
and having some heaviness from
eating eggs, a rarity.

Felt like I needed some protein.

Woke up early the morning "After the Opening"
at the Whole Being Weekend.

I am in one of those Rare Moments
when I can see all the things I would like
to do. I am feeling with confidence
and assurance.

This is the afternoon of the second
of the Ten Days of Awe, and I am filled
with Awesome Seed Dreams.

Here some in no order of priority...
just notes I took down this morning.

-Visit with Gabriel Counsens at the Tree of Life.

Been feeling a pull in his direction for a number
of weeks, with both Michael Bedar, the PR man,
and Carol Geeck, an old ally from Dr. Jensen,
opening the energy. Michael met Gabriel when
they connected at the Essene Workshop that I
put together a few years back. Michael wants that
footage he shot of the Shabbat.

What workshop would I want to teach there?

whole Being Follow Up Blogs

Teen Sex--I want to encourage the Teens
to have a workshop. Talked to a couple about it.
What kind of support could they gi ve each other
about growing up healthfully? Some of these
young people have been part of the Whole Being
Weekend since they were little kids.

They already have rap sessions, but what would
an all teen discussion look like?

What kind of Whole Being parental advise would a mom
want to give her 13 year old daughter.

I sat down Friday night with one Mom who has been
at the Whole Being Weekend for many years. She described
her unsettledness when her daughter did not come
back to the tent last weekend. The next day I met the daughter.

Mom was expressing the challenges of raising a teen
and having a hands off policy to let her have the experiences
she needed...yet what should Whole Being Teens know?
What Ethics work for them?

Once my dear friend R in L.A. described to be a experience
she had when she was studying with some of the early
Tantra Masters. A mom had brought her daughter in for
some education.

--Low Priority.

___

Curezone.com--FInd out about being a Sponsor.
EXplore different arrangements where there is a flow
around Money.

$ for Curezone--more encouraging of donations through
my Blog. Have you donated lately? What is the financial
health of Curezone?

I get a lot from Blogging here.

Feel to promote my Blog more outside this website.

Use of Marketplace on this site.

How can it work to sell some writings?

How to work within the structures of Curezone,
and sell things.

___

Mandaza--The African Shaman.
I remember he was to be back in the US this time of
year. Did I miss that. I would love to visit him
with Best Friend. Mandaza once said that she
was my Medicine. He said we would be together
whether we were in this life or out.

He saw the pain I was feeling at the time.
He asked here if she loved me?

We have had a lot of lovely intimate encounters
since then.

I am on the verse of some extraordinary healing
within myself at the core of my success in the world.
Best Friend stimulates and triggers some of these
areas where I feel compelled to grow.

I attended a workshop at theWBW with Adam,
who is one of the leaders of the Tantra Committee.

I was impressed with the freedom he has with his
wife. I was watching her dancing independently on Friday night
while he was no where in sight.

In the workshop, he recommended a book called
"Undefended Love." I want to get that book.

Adam was saying that he chooses Freedom over Security
in his life.

He is both into Tantra as well as Polyamory.

At the party I went to at Kamala's a couple weeks ago,
Adam and Lourdis were in the hot tub at the same time
and both were receiving and giving touch to different partners.

A very magical woman who is starting a spa, came over
to me at that party, and we connected around having some
of my art at her new spa in San Diego.

She knew me from the WBW.

That night, I was processing exclusion and this long
summer of isolation. I felt that most important thing I could
do was get in that tub, but I did not know how to do it
emotionally. I asked Kamala's partner, Michael to help me,
and he spoke up in my behalf.

The Spa lady was in the tub with ....say..wait a minute...
maybe they would not appreciate me writing about this....
I better ask first.

Anyway, back to the weekend...

Adam's workshop was right to the point of what I needed.

He addressed the question of how lots of people build
walls of agreements with their loved ones as if that can
protect them from their underlying fears.

He said, go through the fear. He was saying it was possible
to get to the other side.

Most of us never got our needs met as kids. We did not
receive what we needed from Mom or Dad. We grow up
afraid we are going to be abandoned.

I really want to outgrow this.
I really want to outgrow this.

IT is cramping my Joy.

Best Friend has been expressing Freedom Urges in
the last month. We have a relationship with no definition
other than we are Twin Souls and Best Friends.

I am choosing and rechoosing this relationship for
more than six years, yet I feel insecure at times.

I was relooking over my poetry books before the WBWK.

They are filled with poems about this same theme
repeated decade after decade in my life.

A healer at the WBW was speaking to the Eclispe.

She repeated the same theme that I wrote about
in my book, "Prayers to Mend the Heart."

We cycle through Dependence,
to Independence, to Interdepence
over and over at different levels of the Spiral.

This is a Time when many of us are Spirally
out of Dependence again.

Regina was coaching me earlier in the week
about making the Shekinah, my Feminine aspect
of God, as my primary Lover who is always with me.
I have many poems where I write about Mother Earth
Gaia in this way.

I did a singles Puja at the WBW. I had about
six partners before we went into a hug fest.
It was sweet, giving and receiving to the inner circle
of women who aspired to be in their Goddess.

This is a time, as my former Lover, and Soul Friend,
The Dancer once said, "Leave it on the Dance Floor."
Tantra Pujas are all about Opening and then Moving on,
yet Francoise was inviting us at the close to see if any
of the partners we danced with might want to be our
partner at the Advanced Puja scheduled for that night.

I don't know. I am having breakthroughs with old patterns.
That was very obvious this weekend.
I am in a sweet place today, :"After the Opening."

A number of women at the weekend came up to me.
They had seen my body over a lot of years.
They could not get over how improved my posture is.
I am standing straighten, they told me.
Both kept asking, "What therapies did I use?"

Best Friend has been one of my Deepest Healing Medicines.
It takes infinite patience, self love, as well as
holding on, to stay in a relationship that has the capacity
to push your buttons and help you see where you need
more homework.

She definitely helps me see what I do not like in myself.

Adam was saying, that he search for freedom involves
telling the truth to himself and others.

He realized there is a part of him calls himself names.
So he has found himself just admitting to the fact that he
is a F---Up in different ways. He does not deny this.
He says it outloud. Then he found he got underneath and
the feeling dissapeared!!!!

He was talking about getting into the fear when it comes
up...really getting in deep, so that a person can get underneath.

There is no way I can control Best Friend. Why even Try?
Why want to control her? And yet, what do I really want
from a relationship?

Maybe I have just what I want.

What kind of security do I need?

I want to love my purpose in life.
I want to make love to thousands through my words.
I want to experience the ultimate pleasure of allowing
acceptance for the many words of wisdom that
I have taken time to capture.

I want ebooks out there.
I want hard cover books out there.
I want a great home life, with a live in community
that is really an expression of my freedom.

EG Intentional Community HomeLife:

I would like to take the energy of the Whole Being Weekend
and bring it here.

"Soilmates!"
"Soilmates!"

I want a core group of extended community coming here
to experiencet themselves as Soilmates!

I made a number of new friends at this year's
WB Weekend.

Sandra was at the preview volunteer happenings.
She loves my T shirt that Best Friend gave me,
the one that says, "Life is SImple. Eat. Sleep. Garden."

Some times Best Friend jokes--
"Pee, eat, make love, Sleep."

I love it when she is in those moods where Make Love
is on the agenda. Never met a woman so high in
desire when she is--she cycles in and out of it so
totally, so completely.

Take Two: in recent months...there is more of her
present. She is not cycling out of it so dramatically.
She is really, really, healing.

What a woman! What a Joy to be able to be
the man who hears her honest, uncompromised truths.
Quite a Mitzvah to be there for another human being
to practice both their 'No!" and 'Yes."

Was making me queezy as well the last month.
Not sure if I had the strengh to enjoy her taking on
a new friendship with another man, when I am into
enjoying our physical and emotional Us ness.

Oh well, it is one time when I prefer to say.
God as a better plan than I do.

Other new friends made at the weekend:
Possible Follow UPs:

Deb--student at Pcom...
Has a lovely little daughter
and a nice mom. Is she Jewish?
Don't think so. Beautiful spirit.

K -we shared some intimate conversation
on Sat night while the Puja was going on.
She said, she liked dancing naked under the moon.
She has the same spiritual orientation that Best Friend
and I do: We find comfort in many Spiritual Traditions.

Very interesting, background. Her SO is a transgender
male who was born a female.

Well, that's a new experience for me to explore!

Beautiful eyes. She turned me on to a new place
to worship that is close to my house. I heard about it.

Shilot Healing Center.

FU!! (FU=Follow UP)

Let's see...

Laksmi...She helped me take down the Altar...
Lovely... she has 12 years training with Soul Retrieval
in the Shamanic Tradition. She is a link I have been asking for
to Sister Sarita, the mother of Ruiz who wrote "The Four Agreements."

Sister Sarita is a Shamanic healer. She has been in my dreams.
We worked together in the 80's I want to see her before she leaves
the body. She must be near 100.

Laksmi has worked with her and Ruiz for 12 years.
She drummed and helped me take down the Plant Your Dream
Altar. Very beautiful woman...blonde, knows her
boundaries...pushed her out of the way a bit to get a photo
at the Larisa Stow event... didn't mean to...she made a point
of letitng me know. I apologized. I was singleminded
and in my Zone.

Wait till you see some of the photos!!!!!!!!

Photos:

Put some up on my Whole Being site.

Another reason to purchase the new Mac.
Tired of wasting time...Wait...why not just use a Mac
at the Continuing Ed place to upload????
or at the Joan Kroc center nearby...they have a room
filled with PC's.

Writing Mac--clear I am going to use this Mac
for writing. I do not like the word process offerings
on the new Mac.

Goal this year--many of my MS in good shape for printing
in this computer...

New Allies Made at this year's Whole Being Weekend:

Mirabai Devi--did a Darshan with her.
Took her photos.

FU!! Send to her as promised.

Rayna Thompson--New Ally Sponsor...she will link to my site.
She runs Yogafinders. She gets 10,000 hits a day.

Http://www.yogafinder.com

4:09 PM
Spend the last twenty minutes exploring links off
Rayna's site. She bought one of The Seven Love Cures
and wants to attend a workshop on this with me.

Yum!!!

http://www.the-spring.com/palm_springs_day_spa.html

I could use this Gentleman's Package this afternoon.
How about you???

More soon!
Got to go check the Rose Apple
Tree. Feeling to have some fruit
grow on my own tree.

4:17 PM

Angel Laughter!

Just went out to see if there was any fruti
fallen from the Rose Apple Tree.
Every morning it gives some.

Last night, I came into the house through
the front door. I usually do not enter this way.

As I passed the Rose Apple Tree,
a fruit fell and nearly hit me in the head.

I looked for it in the dark, but could not find it.
Today I found it!

It was an unripe Rose Apple!

They never fall during this stage.

Something was playing with me,
and saying Welcome Home!!!!

4:54 PM

Drats!!!

Can't find Sandra's phone #!!!!
I gave her mine and invited her to come over
October 8 for our first Soilmates gathering.
Hope she gets in touch!!!!

She was one of the strongest connections
for the weekend....I really want to talk to her now...


September 26, 06
2:16 PM

Other connections from the Weekend:

Kat Alessi
http://www.energykatalyst.com/6.html
___




The phone rings...it is Julia...another Whole Being Friend.
I made before the weekend.

4:56 PM

I am feeling tired.

What to do now???

Where did I write Sandra's #???

Sandra and Stan, Souldancer will connect me
hopefully tomorrow night.

___



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