A woman in her prime is coming over for some photos. I'm looking forward to this.

Date:   1/21/2006 2:18:15 PM ( 18 y ago)

Got a call back from Wendy,
beautiful Wendy.

She asked me if I would take photos of her
last weekend when I was at the Goddess Temple.
She left the party early. Then I got a call that she was
heading North, but wanted to take photos when she got
back from helping a friend.

I called her. She called me back from the road on
her way down from San Francisco yesterday.

We made a date to meet today at 2 PM
here in the garden.

It sounded provocative. A woman in her prime,
with dreadlocks, a woman who esteems me,
who I have seen at a number of parties in the last year
and senses she has some sense of me.

She is more than she seems.
She just moved on from a job at UCSD
where she did reseach. She also wants to do
acting, and is looking for work.

She feels like a woman on the way up
a woman into living. I am feeling melancholy today
and wondered if she was really going to come over.

She mentioned wanting some photos half nude,
with good taste.

IT is bright day in the garden.
I have had some ideas of my own for a couple weeks
that I did not have a chance to take....
a woman with the bananas,
a Goddess esteeming the ceremoyas,
fruit and full.

I was reflecting on that article I post last night,
the one about the Psychology of the Islamic Youth
who are so distanced from everything tender and lovely
in life that they turn their frustration to the promise
that once they leave this ugly world, the will be with 72
Virgins in Heaven. IT's is God's Promise, so why not
be a Hero and get the F-K out of here. That is the mentality
of the Suicide Bomber, according to this article.

So here I am cleaning up and really enjoying some hours
away from this sitting place, computer, and wall in front of my face.

I am thinking of what Judith said about how I go so deep into
the spirit--and then fragment down here. It's true, I haven't a clue
about all the things I say I will do or set in motion.

At times, I am focused and get some where, but then when I pull back,
I see that there is something equally important wanting my time.
No wonder I get frustrated.

I am wondering about this article about the Bomber's mentality.
It clearly paints a picture of a people in insanity.
I wonder, have I, have we in this culture any less of an insanity?
Maybe ours is a little different, but we are still insane.

I am wondering, why Live? What to Live for?
I really don't want to keep all these records, and do such
a lousy job that brings up anxiety when deadlines are so far
past due. And then, the questions of doing it right.

Meanwhile, there is this very exquisite technology that Nature
made, and most of us are ignoring it in this country. It goes
with round edges, and people who somehow raise families
and kids that bring joy to the continuity of life.

And yet everyone fragments. We have to. Life as a whole
is a real mess.

Hopefully, she will be here at 2.
Today I will focus on a creative, special connection
with a woman in her prime,
and all the insanity in the world will stop for a moment.

12:17 PM
Saturday January 21, 06



 

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