In is sunset and the energy passes from Netzach-- endurance to Hod--the Physical Containers where balance can happen between Force and Form. I do not feel strong in these areas now.

Date:   6/9/2005 9:25:26 PM ( 19 y ago)

This time I have been writing about
for near 49 days....this journey
connecting the energy centers
on the Tree of Life it is near complete.
The 49 day is Sunday and then at eve
time, comes the 50th day.

In the ancient times, the people
decorated their animals with the
first fruits and brought them to the Temple.

That is how I feel now.
I have this sense of being about to
Receive something Big.

It is likely, if I can put my narrow places
aside, A Significant Writing, that culminates
this 49 Day Journey.

The First Fruits...they want to come through...
some great writng, but where is the birthplace
that this will happen?

I am not sure.
The best I can do is clear my space...
I have the rent to pay...
I have this absurd bill from Pitney Bowes
that I keep clearing with Credit Card numbers
and they keep sending saying they cannot work
wtih the credit card numbers. So I go online
to get my bill and the serial # of the postage meter
on the bottom of the machine is not the serial #
they want and the account # is not the account
# of the paypostage online account #, and
finally I get word by phone that the statement they have
for me is $100.00, when the printed bill is $0.

I mean, what are we suppose to be doing
living our whole lives opening bills and never
giving birth to the Real WorK of bringing in the First
Fruits???

Where do I want to Be for Shavuot, this Holiday
of celebrating the First Fruits, and as some do,
the Marriage with God?

Can I do this work here close to home?
Have I Allies I can share with that I can go deep?

And below the surface is this unmet need
for human connection that I am feeling strongly.

I am grateful that I just got off the phone with
AriellaShira, one of my main spiritual connections
and was able to express some of the ideas
that I would like to write in Anatomy with Wholeness.

See Blog:
http://curezone.com/blogs/m.asp?f=92&i=397

I have gotten some of the other things out of the way,
and if I take care of more bills tonight, I will be
available to move with the energy wherever it might take me.

I still do not know that.

I would be happen bringing up Biodynamic compost
to a friend who is excited about Receiving that,
and then I could go on to other places in LA
Where I would be in a Joyous Spirit, more than
likely, but do I have to leave home for that,
and will my Body allow it?

I am reminded of the quote from Thoreau
that I wrote in one of my Blogs the other day:

"I have no more distinctness or pointedness
in my yearnings than an expanding bud,
which does indeed point to flower and fruit,
to summer and autumn, but is aware
of the warm sun and spring influence only.
I feel ripe for something, yet do nothing,
can’t discover what that thing is.
I feel fertile merely. It is a seed time with me.
I have lain fallow long enough.”
--Thoreau, from his Journal, age 33

The man who led the Passover Retreat I went to
in LA is in town and he would be a tremendous listener
but I am not sure where I want to be.

IT is the evening that ends Netzach in the week of Malchut.
Malchut represents the Kingdom. Netzach emaniates
the energies of Physical Vitality when it is wide open.
Mine feels shut down today...The Soul of Netzach is not
flowing into me today, merely the narrow restricted energies,
the down side of Physical Energy NOT flowing.

Rabbi Falcon says, "Malchut contains a confusion array of
energies, and dealing with our world tends to deplete those
energies." if we are open to the pure and whole energies of
Netzach we receive endurance.

"In Malchut, we need to remember that balance is possible,
that all the many facets of reality are aspects of the One,."
says Rabbi Falcon.






 

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