Sciatica symptoms continue to diminish, continued verification of emotional tension as predominant cause, a Truth-Telling Group is of paramount importance in recovery, Realizing that "no-reply" probably indicates some kind of processing is going on, my prayer and I am being born again!

Date:   3/26/2005 5:57:05 AM ( 19 y ago)

Continuing from Prt 9:
I did share the letter with my truth-telling group facilitator and was supported in adding some more clarity, that it was my intention to "leave the door open" for my mother's reply. However, I haven't received a reply as of yesterday's mail.

This recent Wednesday was another group meeting and it was my first opportunity to share the whole letter with those who were present. Reading my letter was immediately helpful for me in that I was reminded of the fact that I had said I was open to a reply "whenever"! Up until then I had been "counting the days" since I mailed the letter, I suppose to gage my anticipation. Well, after I read the letter and remembered how I left it for a reply I felt instantly relieved of expectations! Later that night I journalized and wrote at the end admitting that I was hoping a reply would come before "next year"!

I had a conversation after the meeting with one of my friends (who is in the truth group) and said that since no reply had come as yet, it seemed likely to me that there is other than great joy happening on the receiving end of the letter and that anything less than joy deserved my empathy and love and I declared then and there that I would send love to my mother through her process with my letter. And I have been doing that. My prayer is: "From my Guardian Angel, unto (my mother's) Guardian Angel, I offer (my mother) God's Joy and Peace".

All in all it should be known that the sciatica symptoms continue to be diminished I have been sleeping full nights of deep sleep! The connection to emotional tension as the primary causative factor is unmistakably clear to me. The powerful support that I have gained from participating in a Truth-Telling Group is truly of paramount proportions in my "recovery" process! I have to say that IMO anyone suffering from any physical symptoms of pain and/or inflammation should consider either joining or starting a truth telling group. The two source that my group has drawn from are Susan Campbell (for whom I don't have a website at the moment) and .

There was one participant in my truth group who expressed questions after I read the letter. This one claimed they were hearing a contradiction between my denial of "blood ties" and another expression that I don't remember exactly (and so I'm not going to guess at it just now). There was also something said about my referring to (my) parents as an archetype of power in my life. I responded (while continuing in the expanded state I was in from reading the letter) with great reception to the apparent conflict/contradiction in this one's mind saying that I essentially agreed that those "observations" could be validated in my own self assessment and that it is part of the territory that I am working through. That I am reclaiming my power (and I would add in this moment that includes being my own mother, my own father, my own parent, my own authority, etc.) and in a way that is still open to relating with others as long as they know that I now have "moved" from where I had last contacted them from. It's a matter of reporting my change and my "promise" that I'm not going back to the old manner of relating, the old personality that they knew. And that for me was actually an old mask! Look up "person".

And that brings me back to my first entry regarding "rebirthing". I am being born again and it's without the help of some organized religion, thank God! My body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and that's the Spirit of Truth! It is my primary allegiance to speak in this Spirit. (Oh boy, it's about 4 AM now. The time has flown by without my awareness.) Blessed Moments to us all!

 

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