Dream Whole Being Weekend July 18

Date:   7/18/2014 8:33:39 AM ( 10 y ago)

Journal notes--impactful morning.

Gov of CA comes to Whole Being Weekend Dream July 18

july 18, 2014
6:33 am


Two impactful events:

The first is the dream I had early this morning. I am on my way back to the whole being weekend. I've been there already and seen tremendous preparation for the arrival of the governor of California. I'm very impressed with how much progress the organizers have made since the days when I went to attend the whole being weekend regularly.

On my way back to the weekend after leaving I collect two tiny little babies who are in my cart.

I also realize that somehow crucial materials for the governors visit are in my cart.

I do not know how they got there. Maybe somehow my cart and there's got switched. The two little babies have gone through an ordeal and I left them in a precarious situation. it could've been dangerous. I went off to attend to something I felt I had to do.


(my dad did that to me a lot when I was a kid…8:24 am)

I go back to retrieve them. I'm grateful that they are doing as well as they are.

I gather them up in my cart where they sit at the in the front.

Before I pick them up I have had an opportunity to give a clearing talk to some of the people about the important role I feel I played in years past at the whole being weekend.

I have explained how doing a ceremony with Seeds is conducted properly. I feel I am the one who has done this important function at the weekend. I need to do it as part of the governors function at the whole being weekend.

I wake up. I'm writing up this dream. I realize that if I went back to the weekend no one would likely remember me although I was a major player here for many years. It saddens me.


9What does this mean?--8:28 am)

Second event:

I have water coming out of my bowel this morning. I did not want to stay home yesterday afternoon. Nadine was retreating and and isolation. Eva and B were encouraging me to go to the Hot Springs with them.

I went to the Hot Springs even though my bowel digestion ability was compromised when I went earlier in the week with Eva and Nadine.

My bowel is worse this morning than it was before I went. It is in shock. I'm not able to have a healthy bowel movement. I feel I need someone to take care of me. The weight of the ordeal of attempting to manage so many other people is pressing in on me this morning.

I'm not sure what to do. I don't feel it's good for me to go to the Kroc Center in this condition.

I need someone to hold me.

I am the babies in the dream. I barely survived to get here to this place now. I need care. Very concerned.

Going to call Lurrae.

______

Her mom would like me to take care of her financially.
I am not able to do that.
check this out with Mom.
She is depressed because she has no money to take care of herself.

I feel I am at point zero today.
I am not able to take care of anyone.
I hope I can figure out how to take care of myself starting with today.

I took out the trash.

7:52 am

____

I spend a lot of my energy in worry.
Worry will not help me now.
I am distracted in worry every day.

_____

I am dependent on her.
dangerous now.
8:20 am
____

I spoke this blog. corrections made 8:32 am)

call Eva…

I just got up and look out the window…big trees.
feeling; this is too much for me to tend to/
Oh, I haven't thought that for a while.

8:39 am

 

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