Day 3 - Faith helps keep me strong... no whining!

Date:   3/7/2014 12:57:26 PM ( 10 y ago)

Last night I had 2 bowls of chicken broth - with splashes of 'Red Hot' hot sauce - felt all right. Bummer that I started feeling kinda sick before I left work last night, so the broth felt pretty good & decided to go to bed early to get rest so I may feel better in the morn - No such luck -came down with nasty cough that my family has been so generously passing around :-)
Embarrassed to say, but boy that broth went through my system after I drank it! Had to kick my critter out the bathroom when she was getting through with her shower - poor thing ..."EMERGENCY! OUT!!! I SAY!!!!" Felt good, but not relieved. As though it is the beginning of things to come... I just pray it does not happen at work!!! Now BAMM! that would be embarrassing.
I decide to leave the building like 30 minutes ago - to purchase some veggie/fruit juice down the street at the Walmart - had to come back...forgot my debit card! Bummer, now i will definitely have to endure the wonderful smells coming from the kitchen...Oh well. Guess I should just get used to it & endure.
I am shocked at my sense of truly committing to this fast.
How many times in the past I have attempted? - only to give up by dinner time - or the alternate day fasting for my next diet..only to give up by dinner time. Again.
Amazing where my resolution is coming from....Godly.
Truly & without a doubt.
My belief in God has always been strong - maybe there is something to be said about the catholic guilt instilled from a very young age by my Momma - at times I have resented her for it. But my love of God, I owe to her. The relationship that I am attempting & building with HIM, I owe it to me... to my need & desire of having more of HIM in my life. I need to understand why if my belief in Him is so strong - why do I sometimes have creeping thoughts and am doubtful of the existence of an afterlife or a Heaven?
I do believe in the existence of spiritual beings - In the past, I have frightening experiences with 'spirits?'
'messengers'? 'souls'? whatever they were to make me a believer! - But My faith needs to be strengthened to believe 100% - without any doubts whatsoever.

Anyhooooo - so it is day 3 for me! whoo-hooo!! since to the end of day 40 does seem like a long time to me, i have decided to take my days by increments of 10's - so my goal as of today is to make it to the 10's (days) then to the 20's & so on and so on....
Otherwise - Gurl will be in trouble LOL!!!
I am sipping on my diet pepsi - the caffeine is good for energy. In a little while, think I will go & get me some water for some white tea.. hubby called & mentioned he bought me some veggie & carrot juice for when I get home. What a guy!
He is being so supportive....it better last for 40 days! LOL
I am going to need all his support----although I don't know how I will approach a work luncheon scheduled for next week.
Our finance manager has approved the lunch - get this....it will take place at a buffet restaurant - the whole finance team is excited to go next Friday ( head team is being considerate for all the people observing meatless Fridays during lent so it will be a buffet that caters & serves different types of fish & vegetarian options )
I don't want to advertise my fast....from the priest at church & from my readings - we are no tsupposed to advertise what we are giving up or doing/offering as penance during lent.... I don't want to to be a topic up for discussion by people at the office (I adore the people I work with (....ok, most of them) but this just feels sacred to me....
I don't want the company to waste the $20 for my meal - I don't want to make my team uncomfortable...so we shall see how I cross that bridge....


 

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