GARDEN MANAGEMENT JOURNAL
FEBRUARY 13, 2013
FINDING WISDOM ON MY KNEES
I was down on my knees about 30 minutes ago. Some papers and materials fell from a chair where I stacked them last night, among clothes that had not been put away and some bills.
The bills have been getting to me. In my attempt to Label GMO's last year, I left many things go.
Now I am having to look at them.
I never took the time to look deeply at the House Finances. I thought things were working, but now, as I take apart and scrutinize these Money Numbers, I realize there is more money going out each month than coming in. I see I have been covering one bill from my personal account that needs to be shared by others.
I see that the amount of money I had put on auto pilot to cover Home Insurance is now $41.00 a month less than I have been setting aside. There are buffer funds that I put aside in case of emergency that were in that same account. They are not existent.
I have been borrowing funds to cover a few other renters from their Last Month Rents, and now this can go no further.
I attempted to make things work, and they worked until now, but today appears to be the Payday.
I am faced with what looks like more than I can handle.
I have a huge Property Tax Bill due and I am shifting around dollars from account to account to somehow make ends meet.
Yesterday, I came home from acupuncture feeling some improvement. I thought I would take a nap, but I did not nap.
I had money numbers rolling around my head, each attached to some level of anxiety that feels like it is having its toll on my kidneys.
The one thing that comes easy to be is writing.
I pick up energy from this, although a feel some sense of potential discomfort in my low back.
I would like to take on some of these impossible things today.
I would like to make some sensible communications.
I cannot carry some of the others who cannot carry themselves.
I can hardly carry myself.
I did not even realize I was attempting to Cure someone else.
I was attempting to resolve what felt like an Emergency Condition with our food supply RE:GMOs.
WHAT CAN I DO NOW TO HELP MYSELF?
Where is up from here?
I feel I need to take care of myself in the face of what looks like impossible conditions.
AM I MAKING A CATASTROPHE UP?
I hear one person in the kitchen. I want to ask them what their plan is to take care of themselves.
I can't carry them.
FROM JOHN TILDEN M.D.
Printed in "Nature Has a Remedy" by Dr. Bernard Jensen,
November 1978:
"Too many people still believe in cures and in spite of my protest that I cannot cure anything, they come and assume the attitude, "Well, here I am and now it is up to you to cure me.: They are foolish enough to believe that a cure should be made without any effort on their part. Living haphazardly, guessing how to live when dependable knowledge can be had is a foolish and inexcusable hazard. I repeat, I cannot cure, but I can teach all who crave knowledge how to live to cure themselves and how to live and stay well."--
John H. Tilden M.D.
Finding Wisdom on My Knees
FEBRUARY 13, 2013
November 1978:
John H. Tilden M.D.