Day 10 - June 19, 2010 by Sacristia .....

My daily diary of my fasting journey

Date:   6/19/2010 10:39:25 PM ( 13 y ago)

Last night was hard. I gave myself an enema because the detox symtoms were just horrible. Drinking water was just not doing it anymore so I knew I had some toxic in my that needed out. I had a lot of cramping but when it was all over, I emptied my intestine and bowel out of a good amount. More then I thought I would have had. I feel better immediatedly!

I still tossed and turned in the night. My normaly sleep position laying on my left side, with most of my body resting on my body pillow didn't seem to give me peace or bring in sleep like it used to. I found sleeping on my stomach or even laying on my back more comfortable. Mostly sleeping on my back helps.

I felt horrible most of the day. If I got over excited or did something suddenly, I felt very nauseous. When I bought my normally 3 bottles of water, when I got to my friend's house, I also bought a small bottle of cranberry juice to sip if the nausea got too bad. I did take 3 tiny sips, but thought out the day it didn't seem to help at all, so I might still have something toxic in my body.

I really need to figure this out because if my boss sees me struggling with this issue, he will think I am sick and send me home from work, which I do not want.

I have also noticed that if I sit up in a chair too long, it really wears me out. It does a number on my back and all I want to do is lay down. I think maybe my back muscles must be weak and now I am feeling it.

I did walk 4.52 miles today. At one point, when over at my frend's house. My friend made a comment that since her teenage daughter wouldn't do something for her mother, anyone could go and knock some sense into her if they wanted to. B. be very sassy and disrespectful to her mother. I am her God mother. I knew that my best friend was just kidding, but I dashed from my chair out in the yard and ran up those long flight of stairs after B. She saw me and ran faster. When I got into the apartment, B. told me "I will do it! I will do!" She knows I don't put up with her crap especially with her disrespecting her mother and not listening to her. I walked down stairs very slowly. I was weak until I got down stairs again and sat in my chair. It wore me out! I know my heart goes slower and I have to do things slower now, or I will pass out or get really nauseous.

I went grocery shopping for a couple things: garbage bags, water, fly strips, a bottle of cranberry juice for the house, in case I take the one I have to work, cat litter and cat food and a half gallon of milk for P. and his son.

When I was over at my friend's house, she asked me when P came home Sunday was he just come back to pick the rest of his stuff. I never thought of it that way and now I am worrying that Sunday will be the last day I will see him. There hasn't been any time for me in the last 5 months and now when I thought I might get a little bit of time, the time has ran out. I feel like a fool for giving my heart, my home and my time to someone that squandered all those things as it was nothing. I gave and gave, with the hope he would give back, but all he did was take. My mother says he is selfish, regardless on he has told me several times I am selfish. I have tried not to be selfish and think of myself. Sigh.

I was able to fit into my cargo pants shorts, when just 10 days ago they were too tight for me to button let alone wear. They are very comfortable to wear now. I actually have a bit of room in them now that I can stick both hands in the gap in the waist now. That is a lovely thing.

I have drank about 72 ounces of water today. It has been hot and I have been trying to chase way the nausea as well.

I have also noticed that I have had alot of mucus drainage lately the last day or two that make me swallow alot. I really don't like it much. I haven't had any blemishes pop up anywhere. That is always good.

I hope the next day or two helps with my nausea issue. I have always had heavy detox symptoms around Day 14 of my fast. I hope it lesses soon.


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