Still on the wagon. by thisaintascene .....

Just some random thoughts.

Date:   10/12/2008 4:44:34 PM ( 14 y ago)

I have done beter and better. I think that being here and holding myself accountable is working. I did start the p&b shakes back up. Had a little result of that today. I have been having the most vile gas though. This can be very embarrassing. There is some good news though, I have a job interview at Macy's coming up and I have felt no anxiety about this at all. I am actually looking forward to seeing if having a job really does give the self worth thing they say it does. I have never been on my own, or ever taken care of myself. I am waiting to see who I really am before I make any huge decisions. I'm still unsure of where I am with my hubby and our future together. We may want different things. I think even though he has given up pot, he still drinks too much. He thinks at least he's not adding vodka in with the beer to get wasted. I say what's the difference? Anyway, We'll talk it out and fight, and nothing will be solved. I do think that when the time comes that I can support myself and feel good about myself, if he hasn't done the same I will be forced to move on. Not because I don't love him and want to be married to him, but for self preservation.


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