It's ok, try again.
Date: 1/16/2008 12:28:15 AM ( 16 y ago)
I stopped fasting today, out of fear. The rashes has spread to cover my entire limbs. The inflammation of the rashes begin to recede and replaced by dried wrinkley scabs, which I am pretty sure that will peel off after a while. For the arms, the upper limbs are dry; elbow inflammation almost entirely resoluted and wounds close to complete recovery; lower arm dry wrinkled with diffuse rashes (especially on neem oil application). For the trunk, neck and shoulders dry but skin peels off naturally, occasional itch along sternum and breasts, abdominal area cleared off rash and scabs. For legs, inner thighs are covered in non-ithy rash. Knee caps are like elephant skin and but if left untouched, the skin heals and inflammation is reduced significantly. Back of knee is hypopigmented and this upsets me the most. Lower legs are dry with diffuse rash. Ventral parts of feet are covered in bright rash rash. Face is very dry. Scalp seems to suffer from flaky skin too. Nose is normally blocked. Nasal mucus secretion reduced.
I am so scared, fully aware of how inane I am because I know my body is on track. But seeing the rash o my hands and feet is the last straw.
I called my Ayuverda physician and she gave me a mental booster where to appreciate each improvement, however small, and continue to work hard at doing all that is necessary ( emotional happiness, physical happiness, mental happiness). Keep taking my supplements and oils. Don't give up.
It is true it has been stressful lately with the overwhelming amount of studies compared to the time I have to prepare for my exams and with no place to sleep everyday. I am constantly lethargic. And I hate the weight I have put on over the last months. Well, today, I am going to create a study plan. I will sleep in medical school semiar rooms, if it is open, or the bench or canteen as last resort. And if I keep my head levelled during the new fast, I will lose the weight very easily and effortlessly.
It is only the 4th day since school started. It is ok that I am still finding my footing. Don't panic. Don't be afraid. One problem at a time. I can do this again. I earnestly want to get this right.
Alright, so let me do a colon cleanse and I shall start again later today.
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