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Day 2 - Dry fasting goes on
Thoughts are more on healing the mind and less on healing the body. This is truly my objective for fasting when I am able to silence the ego's raucous preoccupations with form.
Date: 4/22/2015 10:30:59 AM ( 9 y ) ... viewed 611 times 12am
I'm in 26 hours with the dry fast. I am feeling hunger and this time it's an empty burning ache in my stomach. I've read about doing deep and very slow breathing exercises for this and it does seem to be helping. Everything from my lower back down is aching. My glutes/quads are burning like I've been doing squats. But instead of focusing on aches and pains in the negative sense, I am now trying to remember that they are signs for healing. Yaaaayy! I am feeling better with each moment! I feel well! I'm doing something very good for my body.
6:40am
First time I woke up last night was at 2:30am. What a difference. All aches seemed to have just disappeared within a matter of hours. I had some sinus congestion but otherwise felt okay. No hunger or thirst. Next time I woke up was about 4:30am. I actually felt pretty good and seemed that I had adequate restful sleep. I did feel some hunger. I tried to go back to sleep but my mind just seemed wide awake. I decided what the heck clean up my kitchen a bit and do a coffee enema. It's very routine when I do my coffee I use that time to read my ACIM, do the lesson, and pray/meditate. I love this time when it seems the world is asleep. It is easier to feel connected to God. It is more natural to be in "being" mode rather than "doing" mode. I feel so at peace. These are the moments when clarity occur. The world and all that I know becomes meaningless. I feel so present that even the simplest act of washing your hands can feel so sacred. I want this feeling all the time.
This is what's so great about being where I am in my life. I have achieved my educational goals, career goals, financial goals, material goals, and much of my family goals. I went from the phase of acquiring things to one now of giving up and letting go. I realized that happiness, or rather, true joy comes from letting go and being liberated. To be free and at peace gives me the greatest joy. I am not saying I am totally free of my attachments to this world but it holds less and less value for me. I gave up my career and the money and the comforts that came with it. Though I enjoy the comforts I have, I don't think I would have much resistance to giving up my house and vehicles if it would come to that. I would just as well live in a hut in some remote island and live off the land.
7:42
So, I have my kids off to school. Morning madness has temporarily returned to quiet stillness. I just wish I could hold on to the peace and stillness longer. Frankly, I am challenged with vacillating from the sanity and stillness of Spirit to the insanity and chaos of the world. At times I feel so clear about my purpose here and other times I wonder what the hell am I doing in this place.
I remember my lesson from ACIM:
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CH. 14
XI. The Test of Truth
...You have one test, as sure as God, by which to recognize if what you learned is true. If you are wholly free of fear of any kind, and if all those who meet, or even think of you, share in your perfect peace, then you can be sure that you have learned God’s lesson, and not yours. Unless all this is true there are dark lessons in your minds which hurt and hinder you, and everyone around you. The absence of perfect peace means but one thing: You think you do not will for God’s Son (each of us) what His Father wills for him. Every dark lesson teaches this, in one form or another. And each bright lesson, with which the Holy Spirit will replace the dark ones you do not accept and hide, teaches you that you will with the Father unto His Son.
Do not be concerned how you can learn a lesson so completely different from everything you have taught yourselves. How would you know? Your part is very simple. You need only recognize that everything you learned you do not want. Ask to be taught, and do not use your experiences to confirm what you have learned. When your peace is threatened, or disturbed in any way, say to yourself,
“I do not know what anything, including this, means.And so I do not know how to respond to it.
And I will not use my own past learning as the light to guide me now.”
By this refusal to attempt to teach yourself what you do not know, the Guide Whom God has given you will speak to you. He will take His rightful place in your awareness the instant you abandon it, and offer it to Him.
You cannot be your guide to miracles, for it is you who made them necessary. And because you did, the means on which you can depend for miracles has been provided for you. God’s Son can make no needs His Father will not meet, if he but turn to Him ever so little.
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11:11am
I'm at the 37th hour. I just went to the gym for some dry/wet sauna. I felt fine through it all. I was okay with all that heat and nothing to drink. The moisture in the wet sauna was a nice welcome. I felt like a sponge soaking it all up. I felt my skin rather on the dry and itchy side last night. I was able to breathe in my eucalyptus/tea tree oils to help with mild congestion and breathing. Interestingly when I got home I felt a bit winded so I crawled into bed. I could feel my heart beating through my chest as i tried to briefly catch my breath. I was fine after a few minutes. Did I mention earlier that I have no sore or scratchy throat anymore. As far as cold symptoms, it seems I only have a bit of sinus congestion and not much else. Well, I still feel a bit weak but the fast is probably part of that, if not maybe most of it.
BTW I'm at 134.4lbs and 24.6% body fat. I haven't seen as much of a change on me visually than I did the first 10 days (round 1) of my fast. Things seemed to slooooww down with weight loss as I have less to lose. I am so grateful to have gotten this far. Even though I had not fasted straight all those daysand broken it down to several rounds with less than 10 days break in between
6:34
What a difference a few hours make.
Had to take my son to the city next to us to the department of motor vehicles. With an appointment we spent 3 hours getting his driver's permit. Lord have mercy. We waited in 7 separate lines total. The inefficiency and incompetence of this particular DMV location is just mind boggling. I never thought I would lose my cool but I did. Honestly, in hind sight, I think I was picking up all the pent up negative energies in that place and just wasn't present enough to be prepared for that experience. Have you every been in places like that where the energy feels heavy and negative. Well, I'm praying for some major spiritual cleansing right now to get rid of 3 hours of DMV funk. I'm going to meditate and do some deep breathing to get myself back to serenity.
9pm
an hour away from completing 2 days dry fasting. I really thought I was knocking this cold out. I hadn't sneezed all day until I got to the DMV. I was sneezing more and congestion/sinus pressure got worse. Not feeling thirsty but stomach is grumbling and I am feeling hungry. I am tempted to have some Perrier. But am not gonna do it. Frankly, the physical stuff of fasting today is nothing compared to the emotional stuff i'm going through. Not being able to use food/beverage as a way to help us through rough patches is very challenging indeed. I'm not even talking about apple pie or cheese cake but a bowl of chicken noodle soup, or a latte, fried salmon skin salad, sashimi, handful of almonds, or bowl of popcorn. Something to just take the edge off. This just forces you to face it head on. Well, there is another way. Sleep. Gonna try to relax with deep breathing exercises and hope to fall asleep and be able to start Day 3 (round 2).
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