- Day 7 - June 16, 2010 by Sacristia
13 y
2,279 4 Messages Shown
Blog: My Fasting Diary
I was not active at all yesterday. My heart was not in it at all. My fast has been hard for me, as I am detoxing slowly, so I kind of feel horrible and then P. drops a bomb on me while I am at work. He texts me and says he is going to be out of town for a couple days and will probably be back on Sunday. It made me very nervous and emotional, because it is getting closer and closer to him leaving, which I can find a way to prepare for.
I felt so drained, a bit nauseous when I got home and then finding that he took almost all the things he owned with him, made my system feel even worse then it was. It was a bad bad night for me. I didn't drink a whole lot of water when I was awake. I took a shower thinking it would help relax my body some, but I ended up crying, and gagging to a point I threw up the water I had in my stomach. I was tired but I tossed and turned all night and woke up every hour and then tried to sleep again. I prayed to God several times hoping that somehow I could be spared this pain in my heart, but I know it is my burden to bear since it was my decision to have P. in my life.
The worse thing last night was I had hiccups several times last night which unsettling for me due to my sometimes queasy stomach. I am still having them once in a while. I wonder why. I don't like them because they cause the stomach acid to lurch up and I get the feeling of having heartburn.
I have had some mucus drainage from my sinuses cavity into my throat which is nasty. It isn't constant, but it is annoying since I already have other things to make me nauseous.
My urine smells horrible and is frothy, which means there are proteins in it. My ketones are still at a high level of 80. I am not feeling a nauseous as I was a couple days ago. I really have been taking in a easy and taking everything very slow.
I still have a uneasy feeling in my middle when I am sitting, but that might be because I have gain some weight there I never had before, and it is getting in the way when I sit. I never noticed it before, because my mind was on other things, but since I am on a fast, I tend to monitor everything that is going on with my body. Little aches and pains and I try to figure out why.
I have noticed that my pants a bit looser and getting a bit baggy on me. My face is chiseling out, so you can see my cheek bones better. My neck looks slimmer and more elegant. I have noticed that my calves seem to be more defined then they were, but my arms, thighs and midsection has no change that I can see of. But just wait, I am sure something will happen sooner or later if I prolong my fast.
I noticed one blemish on my back. I was wondering if it was just a precursory on what is to come. Yuck, I had this part of the detox. I won't be able to wear any spaghetti strap shirts in the hot weather.
I have been drained of energy most of the day, but I have made an effort to do things because I really have no choice. I am just so stressed out with my life at this point in time, I don't know how I am keeping up with this fast. I have the chance to go see my mother who will be in Pataskala one day before she journey's on to Michigan with my Uhaul truck. My mother stresses me out because I never live up to expectations. And she will probably try to coddle me regarding P. and make me eat. The woman is over 200 lbs which is severely overweight for her height of 5”5'. My mother eats very unhealthy so I really don't want to be around that right at the moment. She is an emotional eater and I have done so off and on in the past, but curbed it when I realized what I am doing. Plus I am so afraid P. will come back to get the rest of his stuff from my home when I am not there, without saying goodbye or anything. I am so afraid that I won't be able to say goodbye to him. That he will just sneak out of my life no matter that I supported him and his son for 10 months. :o( I hate my life at this point in time.
Trying to be positive and see the good in everything, but it is hard at this time. I must just be having a really bad day. Sigh. . .
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Sacristia
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- Re: Day 7 - June 16, 2010 by apstan222
13 y
1,433
Hi there
Thanks for posting your messages and sorry to hear that you are going through such pain now.
Just seen your picture and you are such a beautiful person so do not waste time worrying about this P guy who it seems did you no favours anyway!
Apologies to comment on your relationship, but sometimes it is best to end it as soon as you realise it is not working out as it is not worth being with someone who does not regard you the same way you do him.
As someone once said, "do not make someone your priority when you are only their option". Think that is quite fitting. Another one I like is "I would rather be better than bitter".
Well done for doing so great on this fast! I myself am a 5ft 4in female who has started a juice fast (blog is 28 lbs through juice fasting).
I have rambled on here so please forgive me if I have offended you, but hope you get the strength you need to move on from all this and look towards the future!
Take care,
Tanni
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apstan222
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- Re: Day 7 - June 16, 2010 by Sacristia
13 y
1,525
Hello Tanni,
I have read your blog. I really enjoy your posts.
Thank you for your comment about my relationship. I was not offended or upset about your comment. I understand what you are saying. This fast has really helped me have a clear mind and calm my heart regarding things that are going on. If anything, I am just so disappointed that I spend 10 months of my life working so hard on something that meant nothing to him. I believe I learned my lesson to be more careful with my heart.
I don't know how long my fast will go, because I am just kind of allowing God to take over and let me know when I should my body and mind has been renewed enough to re-start my new life without P. and see a fresh new outlook on life body with my mind and body.
I am planning to transition to juice fasting once my water fasting is done. I have seriously been thinking after a bit of juice fasting, then transition again to soups made from my juices with just a little bit of pulp in it and so forth so my body is not shocked by solid food. I have had my juicer for about 5 or 6 years and I love it, but haven't used in a while. I can't wait to start using it again.
Maybe we can swap recipes? I have several utter awesome juicer recipes I think you might really love.
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Sacristia
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- Re: Day 7 - June 16, 2010 by apstan222
13 y
1,861
Hi again
Thanks for your message. This is the first time I have been in touch with something on Curezone! I was surprised to see that my blog received two comments - which I did not know about at all until 11 or so months later! (There should be some pop-up sort of message maybe!)
Yes, that would be great re swapping juicing recipes. There are some sites that you can find on google that have different combinations. The ones I use most often are:
1. Grapefruit and orange (if you like the bitter taste);
2. Pineapple with a slice of lemon (with the rind) - have to say this one surprised me as you would think that the lemon would make it bitter, but with the pineapple mixed into it, it is actually very sweet;
3. Grape juice on its own is absolutely wonderful; and
4. Strawberry and apple juice.
No.4 I just discovered yesterday and have to say it is delicious. These were strawberries that were ready for the bin! I juiced about a handful with two small golden delicious apples and it was lovely! It made about a small glass worth.
Your water fast sounds like a lot of work, but good on you for continuing the way you have. Let me know once you get on the juice fasting wagon, and then we will be sure to help each other out!
Take care for now,
Tanni
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apstan222
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