long post about understanding my 'tude

Date:   12/27/2006 12:28:19 PM ( 18 y ago)

So am sitting here wondering what is going on...what had me start eating everything in sight before my mother got here? And now still eating to some degree more food that I usually eat? I know that in the house I live in everyone sits around and isn't active and happy, except for my FIL. I have my husband who is happy (most of the time) but is affected by the subtle energies of the house. My SIL told my mom that there's nothing to do in this town but stay in the house and watch television!!!!!! My mother is never going to come here to live :(

I think that I'm somewhat affected by mother and sister being here very briefly and then leaving. My dog was with them and after the encounter with Sophie, I really do believe in the healing power of pets,esp. dogs. I love cats but as my husband explained to me, cats are by nature aloof because they hunt alone and the most critical times of their lives are spent alone. Sophie bit my SIL on the hand. My dog is a good judge of people. When she first met my husband, she rolled right on her back for him to scratch her belly. My dog can be vicious, esp. towards men. We've never tried to train her because she's an excellent guard dog believe it or not. Anyway, I miss my dog and miss my fish pond. My cherbunkins would eat from my hand. I enjoyed the squirrels in my backyard and had one or two as 'pets' an old one that would come back year after year. Would feed the cats too. Here you really can't do that because number one there are a lot of field mice, rabbits,etc. my FIL is NOT into feeding the animals. Intellectually, I understand why hunting is better than buying the schwag meat from the store. I understand that it makes sense in terms of population control. Look at England. No more fox hunting and now they're overrun with foxes. I don't like it. I'm glad my husband isn't a hunter so he won't be taking our children hunting. I respect my FIL reasons for hunting, he likes the fresh meat and it keeps him in shape and alive (he's almost 80). I just look around and see the mentality and type of people that like hunting. I guess that makes me a crunchy conservative snob but that's how I feel. Or why am I looking down at people that way? I don't know them. Some folks are blatantly unhealthy, sloppy,etc. and then there are folks like my FIL who hunt and are healthy and vibrant, maybe not as healthy as they could be if they only ate fish but are better off than a lot of men their ages.

My mother just called and she sensed something was wrong. I'm worried she'll look around at where I live and not like it. Florida is a wonderful,vibrant place. Here I was worried she might like it here because there aren't a lot of black people here and no West Indians...well there's always a Trinidadian in every corner of the world as she says. I just think she might consider it too boring. However, there are a lot of things to do if one is outdoorsy and into nature.

I'm going to go now and lift weights and do some rebounding. I must generate some good feeling before work. I feel Aunt Flow will arrive today.

 

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