22 Days & Owww

Date:   2/1/2015 11:37:36 PM ( 9 y ago)

22nd afternoon of my fast now - just returned from the 3rd in a row trip to the city & last weekend of Buddhist Teachings. It's all been mostly wonderful, the fast, the teachings & business, a non-paying tenant that left of their own volition which wasn't so awesome but now the house is all sorted and full of good people - I didn't even have to advertise it as one of the girls there had a boyfriend who wanted to take the vacant room -- things smoothing out pretty nicely all in all, there always seems to be some kind of non paying person around the dec/jan phase of the year - strike it up to Christmas being hard for a lot of people these days...

Well I've got a very sore bum today - or anus to be precise, I suppose it's a good thing - I had been getting a little bit - I'm not sure if it was really what you'd call constipated... I passed a couple very small little rock-like or so it felt balls of poo over days I'm not sure something around 19, 20, 21 - wasn't really anything I worried much about but it was a bit scratchy coming out - and then last night, after the big Buddhist final weekend where we did a lot of a very special kind of visualization meditations and purification practices (might have something to do with it! Powerful stuff!!) on the drive home - about a half hour from destination, quite late, must have been after 11 PM, I went in to a servo to use the toilet & had a very bad constipation, was only able to with difficulty eliminate a little tiny ball of this hard stuff & realized I was going to have to wait till I got home & try some soapy enema water and a few glasses of warm water to help - I was in a lot of painful discomfort!!!

Home wasn't too far away at this point - so I just had to deal with the little wait, and a very uncomfortable but now short drive - when I got there in my agony, I quickly proceeded with the soapy enema treatment, warm water & after some trial and suffering eliminated a stunning amount of very thick foul smelling stuff, it was like passing a softball ugh, and my poor littler now bung is very sore today but better out than in, I've been fasting for over 10 years & I've never experienced anything like this before! It wasn't that hard rubbery dark stuff that people describe which coats the colon walls apparently which I've never seen come out of me - it was more of a chocolate brown color but just very thick and quite a lot of it coming out after 21 days of liquid diet - it certainly smelled really awful - it didn't look so old particularly, so it's kind of hard to know if it was really old matter purifying & eliminating or something like a pre-cursor or upper level of that kind of fecal coating we build up - or whether it was just a very constipated mass of stuff that had a lot of toxins in it from the fast - I don't really know. Anyway, only time will ease my sore parts - had a warm bath after that & just went to bed as it was very late - woke up an hour or half hour later and had to go again, dislodging more of the stuff with some of the enema water that was still inside helping to release it - smelled the same but wasn't so much of it the second time - after that it seemed to be over, took a third glass of water & a little bit of tea - 2 sennacot tablets & fell asleep!

I woke this morning with a very flat stomach - another one of those overnight weight loss nights were I wake up with a very noticibly transformed body - a nice thing to wake up to - had a cup of hot chocolate, went wee a few times - painful because my anus still hurts a lot - and well, just going about my day. I have had a small amount of food now - yesterday on the drive home I had a little bit of a very light spinach pie filling they had given us on the retreat - it was kind of perfect food at that stage because it wasn't rich or oily at all, was really light and easy to digest and felt fine. Today I had a small amount of scrambled eggs with corn & cilantro and a small slowly well chewed piece of toast with olive oil in place of butter - I want to eat a little bit along with adding a few large glasses of warm water slugged down pretty quickly and if I'm game enough a laxative tea or maybe just a couple more of those sennacot tablets which seem gentler than some of the teas I posess for that - I might do a bit of very soft porridge with stewed apricots which I canned when my tree was in fruit before this fast started - just sort our a few healthy bowel movements and help with eliminating whatevers coming out & just continue fasting from there -- I think if I've got that dry & constipated or that kind of stuff is coming out and finding it that hard to pass it's better now to eat something that will help me with that and drink quite a bit of warm water etc. So in the past I've usually felt to have a small amount of food mid fast - around the 2 week mark, this might be an indication for me that that's a good thing to do - then again, perhaps I wouldn't have passed this stuff - whatever it was if I hadn't pushed all the way to 21 days without eating. Who knows. Maybe I should add some psyllium to the porridge &/or stewed fruit if I do go for that. Not really eating out of desire, I feel fine & my desire has actually subsided - I struggled with wanting something to eat around the 2 week or so mark but just didn't and went past that - now I've got no real desire which is also nice & feel it will be of benefit & also very easy to just continue on with the fast. I'm a firm believer in going with what your body is telling you & it certainly seems to be a good idea to put some soft bulk into it to help it after that.

Noting this, my stomach has made very minimal digestive noise & felt fine with the little bit I've had so far, a few spoonfuls of food make me feel that satiation we experience when eating even though there was no desire for satiation as such to begin with or appetite which I don't have presently. The cold weather is still continuing strangely for what should be quite hot mid-summer, it makes the fast a little more challenging but not in any big way, I feel I'm doing very well in general & perhaps also that all the travel, being away from home, long periods of sitting both in teachings and in the car to and from the city might have really contributed to my becoming dried out like that or blocked up etc - I'm very glad to be home now with no plans in sight for trips to the city - I think its better for my body which is more sensitive when doing deep fasting like this to be here, with a variety of drinks on hand - the ability to make them when I feel to & not sitting up on long car rides or all day in a group teaching in a meditation hall etc - able to nap if I feel to or bath or take enemas which I also hadn't done for the last week & a half due to being away so much & that that will help me avoid any more pains in the butt lol. Still, it might just be a good thing, whatever came out was certinly not nice and much better out than in, it would just be better if it didn't happen so painfully - going to up my warm water intake for the rest of my fast & take that seriously!!! Didn't think I was particularly dehydrated etc as I had been drinking a litre of coconut water plus teas and a watery hot choc or something etc every day - but I confess I haven't been doing much staight water with all the travel - in the warmer water I was having a lot of soda water drinks but now with this cold snap & the travel it had been easiest just to take litre bottles of coconut water with me everywhere and been kind of living off that... Ok well, wow some flash great news - just heard the rustling of someone walking about the house outside so went out to check out who that was & finally met the owner :)
I've been wanting to meet this guy & have a chat with him about us being interested in buying the place but keeping the banks & real estate agents out of it - just seeing if he was open to us doing a situation where we up the rent we pay and do a kind of rent to own thing over 5-8 years to pay it off & he was totally open & keen, AWESOME!!! Totally love this house & living out here - looks very likely that I'm going to be making a plan which I've been working out in my head for a few months now & sorting out a first property - total paradise out here, really love the idea of pegging down a place to call home that I'm no longer renting & don't have to worry about getting notice to vacate etc - can build up the garden & get off the grid & know my stuff & home is cool when I'm away in Bali etc - a real base that is stable to work from and come back to and which the various activities can radiate outwards from & then when it's all paid off 5 or 8 years from now, no more rent to pay, a center for our cultural foundation - the property's got a second dwelling on it which we could rent for extra income or use as an artist's retreat for the foundation - helping others, etc So many awesome possibilities and things this property can foster - just love it, well was pretty sure the old guy would like my idea but talking to him now just confirmed it, things are moving - not just the old crud in my bowels lol :) Must have got some big blessings as well as purification on that retreat :) Time to drink a couple glasses of warm water & do a bit of chores & morning practice.
Best wishes to all you out there reading & working on yourselves, sorry my blog was a bit in depth & personal today, better to share the real tales of what we go through though, that's part of what curezones all abt
Swastiastu

 

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