Drama Day 14 not knocking me off my cloud!

Date:   11/14/2013 7:37:58 PM ( 11 y ago)

Day 14 fast went well, was a tough day though in some regards, just due to my bf spinning out and all this drama! Challenging on a fast - when going inwards and doing a spiritual cleansing program like this one does become very sensitive - to their environment, energies, smells - to people's emotions, feeling all day like he was just throwing all these emotions around and at me made the fast difficult, the day difficult etc... you have the feeling of wanting to end it, just give up etc... I didn't let that grab any hold of me, could observe it as a danger... and just wanted to be away from the drama and with myself and able to re-establish the equilibrium I've been in all this time. I explained to him a few times as I've done in the past how this effects me and to please remember I'm not just in the everyday normal state I usually operate on and to just try to be more peaceful, calm and gentle... by night he had cut it out, I think that's all over now - I hope so. He's had a lot of stress, out today starting a new job so maybe he was just spinning out about all these new changes and pressure and getting insecure... brilliant guy, sometimes an absolute nutter tho! On a good note, before all the drama kicked in, I had a wonderful practice, meditation and did the best Yoga yet since this fast has started - really getting stronger now, nearly back to where I was when I came home from Bali mid-winter after really rigorous Yoga every day for a couple months in the awesome tropical heat... Sooooo good for you, the best place to practice Yoga for suuure... Maybe I'll get back this coming winter... who knows, wish I could stay there for the whole thing!
Well, new day tomorrow - fresh start, and really deeply happy that bf's got a job - he needed one badly and it looks like a great job for him - really meaningful and deserving of his talents instead of some hack blue collar thing. Really happy to see him make that step - had a great night with him after he calmed down, a beautiful bath and lots of loving :) Men, sigh... can't live with em... hahahah can't live without them... well.... a fast every now and then might make the heart grow fonder lols..
I'm sure I do the same to them tho...
All for today, see y'all tomorrow
Swastiastu


 

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