I am a crack cocaine survivor.
I lived with a crackhead for three years and survived.
From my faith and hope I married that crackhead knowing it was a possession. Today I am still a crackcocaine survivor because I attack crack cocaine with a vengeance.
Before I met Todd:
I did not even know what crack was. I thought crack was something in a sidewalk or a plumber's back side view! I met Todd three days before he was to serve a jail sentence for retail fraud. I remember saying, "What's a retail fraud charge?" "Stealing", Todd replied. "I had an addiction to crack cocaine and stole to pay for my crack use". Todd would also say, "I no longer use but I have to pay for my behavior, so I turned myself in." It did not end there.
When Todd got out of jail he moved in with me. It was not long after that I learned what crack cocaine was and the hell it causes. I had no one to help me. Todd's parents were sick and tired of it and told me I had made my bed, now I have to lie in it. Todd stole from everyone including my parents. When he returned something for them, Todd kept the money. I soon became a victim of crack cocaine. There was nowhere to go to obtain some knowledge about what I know now as the truth about crack cocaine. Help seemed elusive. There were times the money was gone and my phones were shut off. I was getting way behind making house payments and there were times I could not get the things my 4 year old daughter needed. Many times I went without. I became the woman waiting the many hours for her love to return. I was the one who had to explain to our daughter why "father" was not home. I was the woman who made the excuses for family and employers. I was the one who believed in Todd when no one else did, including himself. I was the woman who wiped his tears when he realized what he had done. I was the one who looked for any and all options to get out of this horrible place. I was the one who witnessed a miracle and was the one who with Todd had two more beautiful daughters. I am the one who benefits from the man I knew he is. This was the hardest, ugliest, most joyful time of my life. Though it may seem that you or someone you love will never rid themselves from the possession of crack cocaine. This is wrong, it can be done. Follow your hearts desire. Your heart will tell you the truth. Had I listened to my thoughts, I never would have got past the "you're going to jail in three days" part. I am glad I have a heart.
Todd is an extraordinary man. I am so in love with him. I believe in Todd and his proven ability to stay crack-free forever. It was a hard battle to fight, but he won! You or your loved one can quit. Will it be instantly? It could. For Todd, it took 3 more years from the time he actually committed to finding a way to live crack cocaine free forever. Never give up. Search until you find what works. Knowledge is power. God has provided many ways to escape all evil. Leave no stone unturned. Seek and you will find... knock and the door will be opened... write and you will be answered...help and you will be helped. There are many sayings in life, and one my husband said says it all, "do nothing and nothing will happen." Conquering crack cocaine is a process done on an individual basis.
Staying forever crack-free cannot be done without God. This is a spiritual battle, not an earthly battle. Believe and trust. God can stop your desire to smoke crack cocaine. Will it be easy? No. Can it be done? Yes. Be prepared. The minute you commit yourself to staying away from crack cocaine, Lucifer will be on your crack-tail quicker then you can buy a rock! Listen to God and read scripture to get your shield of armor. Fight until death! Todd and his mom wrote individual books about their experiences with the crack monster. I have read both of them. Both touched my heart with knowledge. My power over being a victim of crack cocaine started after I read both books and continues when I listen to Todd's CD. I am lucky because I get to hear the first note played and watch each song as it is created. The sounds from Todd's guitar brings me to a place of peace and understanding and could bring you there too. Keep faith and hope. With crack cocaine that may be all we have at times. Believe that living crack-free can be accomplished. You may call or e-mail us. We would like to share information about yourself and the journey crack cocaine has you on or a loved one. God will bless all your efforts with success. A place that might be a good start is with Jeremiah 29:11 and 2 Corinthians 5:17.
Camille