Healing MCS Part 1

NEW TITLE, SAME BLOG: I went to a new healer for an evaluation and initial treatment today for my multiple chemical sensitivity and other chronic "challenges". This drawing formulated itself after I arrived home. I don't think I looked quite this bad during the treatment, but this is what it felt like!

Date:   9/9/2008 2:24:36 AM   ( 16 y ) ... viewed 3398 times

Self Portrait: Emotional Detox
Created by Liora Leah 9/8/2008
Pencil drawing


I was diagnosed in 1985 with Environmental Illness, now more commonly referred to as multiple chemical sensitivity, although sometimes I think EI is a more accurate term for me, as in addition to severe sensitivities to man-made chemicals, I'm extremely sensitive to mold, fungi, dust, and other nature-made substances in the environment. Over the years I've picked up more labels, like "fibromyalgia", "chronic fatigue", "depression", "anxiety", and "adjustment disorder" (what the heck is that? It means, in psychiatric jargon, that I'm having difficulty coping with my difficulties!)

I was able to function fairly well, continuing to work, get married, have two children, with some limitations due to health problems until about the year 2000 when my symptoms began to worsen. I crashed and burned in 2001 and haven't worked since (although I consider raising my two teenage children and caring for my ill father for 5 years until his death two years ago to be "work".) I'm on Social Security Disability now, not an easy feat to convince the government of one's inability to function in "normal" society when one "looks normal" from the outside. Now I joke and say that Uncle Sam is paying me to be home and write blogs about the environment and spirituality.

Over the years I've been to physicians, chiropractors, shamans, energy workers, kinesiologists, acupuncturists, and even a hypnotist who have tried all sorts of healing modalities on me--some have given me temporary symptom relief and others failed to do anything but cause my wallet to be thinner.

One of my long-time chiropractors who utilizes energy work/nutritional supplements/homeopathy, whom I credit with keeping me functional for the 13 years I saw him before I "crashed", and whom I still see once a month for acute care (I see him like others would see a physician--and believe you me, there seems always to be some acute problem cropping up on a monthly basis!) told me years ago that he could only relieve my physical symptoms, but he couldn't get to what he thought was the root cause of my problems which he thought were spiritually and emotionally based. I didn't believe him at first, and continued to look for healers who would address my issues from a physiological standpoint. Slowly I've come around to his way of thinking.

Last year I started working with a Native American shamanic practitioner, who agrees with my chiropractor that my physical problems are manifestations of my underlying emotional and spiritual issues. In working with her for the past 18 months, the issues have become clearer, but the healing has been slow-going. Her perspective is that in times of acute stress or trauma in my life, a "window" of sorts was opened where "energies" from "past lives" were able to enter into the Now time--this is hard to explain so please bear with me; it makes so much more sense when she explains it to me than what I can write here. These "energies" were compatible with the "energy" of whatever trauma I was experiencing in this life-time. In other words, if I was experiencing an abusive situation in this Now life, I was made vulnerable to the "energies" of all of the past lives in which I experienced the same or similar abuse. So instead of having to deal with the emotional/energetic issues of this life-time alone, I'm having to deal with the "energies" of hundreds of "past" life-times as well. Talk about the need for clearing!

You may wonder what spirituality has to do with all of this...what I find fascinating is the deep connection between my spiritual and emotional issues. Often-times when I am doing energy clearing work with my shamanic practitioner, I get spontaneous insights into a particular "past life"; there have been many "past lives" where I was the "victim" and was killed for my spiritual beliefs or practices, and other life times when I was the "perpetrator" and killed others whose beliefs were not compatible with mine! There were life times when I felt betrayed by God, was afraid of God, angry with God, lost my faith in God, a feeling of abandonment by God, wanting to be loved by God but not feeling this connection...you name it, I lived it (as have most of us, many times over!) The underlying emotional issues in most of these lifetimes was fear, fear, more fear, anger, rage, a sense of betrayal, a sense of victimhood (God, why is this happening to me? Why are you punishing me?), guilt, shame, unworthiness, etc etc etc ad nauseum.

How's that for a spiritual/emotional legacy?

As I said, the emotional/spiritual past-life energy clearing work with my shamanic practitioner is slow-going. After 18 months, I can honestly say that I feel more emotionally stable (although I still have my ups and downs), more self-confident, more assertive about speaking out about my needs to family and friends (often-times not very diplomatically, I'm afraid--gotta learn to "tone down" a bit), more spiritually centered, and infinitesimally healthier physically--the body sure does lag behind, doesn't it?

During the course of my work with the shaman, I experienced a powerful energy block that she was having difficulty clearing. I intuited that I needed to get some extra help from another person, a friend of mine whom I've seen for acupuncture and is an excellent sound healer. After I saw him twice (he gave me acupuncture treatment while simultaneously using sound therapy--the emotions that were blocked were fear and anger and were associated with a particularly powerful past life experience), my shamanic practitioner was able to clear the residual energy.

Recently, my progress with the shamanic practitioner has been slowing down. She tells me that this is a usual occurance, that people she works with often slow down or have a temporary halt to progress, particularly after they clear (I should probably speak of this as "transmuting" rather than "clearing" the energy, as energy is energy and merely takes another form) loads of past life energy like I've done, then get down to the nitty gritty issues, the last of which are the hardest to work with as they are the "toughest" issues, the ones that have had the most effect on your "Now" life-time, and therefore the most difficult to clear, or transmute. After working with the issue for awhile, we came to the understanding that it might be beneficial for me to get additional help from another practitioner who could work with me utilizing a different approach to the one she is taking with me; hence, my visit to the new healer today for an evaluation.

See Part 2 for a continuation and evaluation results... http://curezone.com/blogs/fm.asp?i=1254404  


Related Blog: This blog depicts the ongoing process of the evolution in my belief system about God: Kabbalah Wheel http://curezone.com/blogs/fm.asp?i=1254022

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