- a penny for my thoughts by angel pie
16 y
2,398 2 Messages Shown
Blog: water fasting is as easy as one, two, ten
I realized earlier that while water fasting my mind automatically starts to wonder and I end up spending a lot just thinking about things; whether they are relevant or not.
There is a guy I like, a lot. He is everything that I need and want right now. He makes me smile without having to say much. he is the only one who can make my cry and smile at the same time by just being himself. He is the guy who I hope to be with soon.
But lately, things have been weird. When I say weird, I mean that we have become distant and withdrawn. Initially we would chat every night and speak about random things (if you guessed that, you know me too well). But now, we chat once a week. Yes, I am aware that I am writing exams but a message now and then would be nice.
It’s like I do not know him. Worst of all I fear that he has found someone else who could possibly be better suited for the role of possibly making him happy. Today he told me he cannot see me for the at least the next 6 weeks. I never thought I could feel so down and sad within the space on 2 seconds.
I handled things calmly and I said that it would be okay. I am insecure, that is no secret. So my fear right now is that he might find someone else. But my head is telling me to hold on and keep things nice and comfortable between us so that he maintains his interest. I think I will do this…I have to try and rekindle what he first saw in me. Should I lose him, I know he will remain a friend and that I could move on BUT I DON’T WANT THAT.
So due to my depression, I wont be going to the gym. Im afraid I might just cause an accident driving to the gym.
….sigh…..how a few words can hurt so much…..sigh…..
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angel pie
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- Re: a penny for my thoughts by Scatterbrained
16 y
1,891
Sweetheart - Please reread what you wrote. YOU are better than that - I don't even know you and I know you are better than that!!
He is everything that I need and want right now - Please, you NEED no one but yourself.
fear that he has found someone else who could possibly be better suited for the role of possibly making him happy - it's not your role or anyone elses role to make him happy. Happiness is within ourselves others can only partake in it with us. If you rely on someone else to make you happy you also give them the ability to make you unhappy. Be happy with yourself and allow other to join you. Never assume you can make someone else happy anymore than they can make you happy, you will only set both of you up for disappointment. Instead focus on enjoying each others happiness!
During your fast you are experiencing something only YOU can benefit from, it's a great time to remind yourself who is most important in your life and who really counts -YOU!!
Now snap out of it get yourself to the gym or whatever else creates YOUR happiness, drink some yummy water and remeber how great you feel and how great you really are!!
Fasting is all about you, there's not a lot inlife we can truly say is 100% about us as individuals -ENJOY IT - YOU are great and YOU are the ruler of your own happiness!!!
Best of luck!!
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Scatterbrained
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